I love that Tony Stark is such a subversion of toxic masculinity in the superhero genre.Ā
Heās not some masculine manly man hero. Heās the most fragile of the Avengersāthatās why he needs a suit to protect him. He wasnāt trained like Clint or Natasha, he canāt turn into an incredibly strong alter-ego like Bruce, heās not an enhanced human like Steve, and heās certainly not a god like Thor.Ā
His first response to aggression isnāt to go to blows, but to use his wit. Heās down for compromise and playing politics to get his way, not punching through the problem.Ā
Heās not some guy whoās afraid of being perceived as effeminate, because he dresses nice, shows interest in fashion.Ā
He defers to a woman in power over him (in fact heās the one who put her there because he saw she was the most capable person for the job).Ā
Heās been cast in the role of theĀ ādamsel in distressā multiple times.
Heās showing interest in becoming a father (is in fact really excited about the prospect), while toxic masculinity is about men showing zero interest in parenting.Ā
Of all the Avengers, itās clear Tony is the most emotionally-driven one, which means heās not your typical āstoicā action hero; we see him lash out, acting irrationally, being overall a dramatic hoe. He almost cries in every single movie (!!!).Ā
Like the entire Iron Man identity is a beautiful metaphor for Tony as a person. At first, he can appear cold and hard on the outside, but then we see heās actually warm and soft under it all. He can get easily hurtāby both physical and emotional blows. He uses arrogance and posturing as a shield to protect himselfāto deceive people into thinking heās not as vulnerable as he really is, which is why he can outwardly present like your typical chauvinist, but, through these films, we see itās all a brittle mask (one he forged after suffering years of abuse at the hands of his father).Ā
Me: yeah so I just donāt have the energy to get up and make myself a sandwich or wait for something to cook so I just. Donāt
Her: why donāt you just eat the sandwich components without putting them together
Me:
Her: you can just eat a handful of cheese and some sandwich meat. You donāt have to make a sandwich.
Me:
Me: what
Therapists finding loopholes for mental illness things is one of my favorite things about dealing with mental illness because it really helps me understand that just because a reaction is Common doesnāt mean itās Right. Does doing dishes stress you out a lot? Buy paper plates. Do your obsessive thoughts make you worry about leaving your curling iron on so you drive home from work to check? Just put the curling iron in your purse and bring it to work with you while we work on tackling where this worry comes from. Symptom management doesnāt have to look like drudgery.
i used to go days without showering because seeing my body was so upsetting that i would end up spiraling and then i realized i could simply turn the lights out. it took some getting used to but iāve been showering with the lights off for years and itās now one of my favorite parts of my day.
do whatever you want nothing is real and thereās no need to inflict unnecessary suffering on yourself just to try to seem ānormalā
I love this post
Hmmm
These kinds of loopholes make life so. Much. Better.
One of my favorite stories is this lady had extremely bad OCD. Every day sheād be late to work because she was convinced that her hair dryer was going to burn down the house so would always have to turn around and check it. Multiple times a day even. A bunch of doctors tied to āfixā her of that fear, until one day she got a doctor that suggested she bring the hair dryer with her. Other doctors were annoyed, saying that wasnāt a the correct way to help, but she gave it a go. When she had that fear, sheād look over and see the hair dryer unplugged in the seat next to her and was able to carry on. I think itās such a perfect example of actually helping someone instead of forcing them into a neurotypical standard.
When you see a really good post but thereās some form of guilt tripping to reblog it added on at the end
(ID: A screenshot of Marge from the Simpsons looking dismally at the camera with one arm raised. A caption underneath her readsĀ āItās true, but Iām not reblogging it.ā End ID)
Smile It Won't Suck Forever 